Run right.

I hope this all comes out correctly. One, because I only have a few very brief moments. And two because I am going to HAVE to be somewhat vague. But man I just HAVE to share.

Last night something happened to me at my part time job that was not very cool at all. I made a call that ended up being wrong and made a couple people mad. Really mad. To the point where I got cussed at. I spent the whole rest of the night basically planning my escape; preparing a phone conversation in my head to my boss this morning about how I simply can't work at this particular location anymore. I pretty much spent all night even as I got home going, "Okay so these are the best terms and conditions. Mm. No, these are. Mm. Actually, this sounds better." Making sure to (internally) sprinkle in a dash of, "See, this is the confirmation that you've given me, God, that I need to have this conversation...this is You trying to tell me...this is totally You, I just know it..." and on and on and on I went. My mind just racing.

When I woke up at 4:30...from the couch...(Guh)...I went into Selah's room just to see her. She was still asleep in her crib. When I put my hand on her arm she woke up, lifted her head up a little, rolled over, put her head back down, and immediately fell back asleep. I sat there as if the world stopped spinning for about 10 seconds and this thought occurred to me for the very first time since the little evening episode:

"There is nothing wrong with learning from your mistakes."

It doesn't mean that all these drastic changes must now occur. It doesn't mean that I have to have a serious sit down with my boss and tell him something along the lines of, "Look. I simply can't ever work here because this, this, this and this." It doesn't mean that it has to remain awkward between me and the guy that cussed me out.

What it does mean is that I can now stay there and just be better equipped. It does mean that I can now go back there tonight (which I had already scheduled myself to do), shake his hand and say "I'm sorry." It does mean that I can think like a man, act like a man, and reason like a man.

I do have to leave something behind. But thankfully it's not what I originally thought.